HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM
Happy Birthday Dear Mitzie. Have fun on your 86th! You have always been a wonderful Mom and a delight to live with us. The question is, how in the hay did you put up with us? We miss you and love you. Glad Lu is with you in Chi town-and for Gosh sakes don't give her too much Birthday Cake!
Pam and Keith xxxxxxOOO
HERE WE ARE AT
LANDS ENDLiterally at the end of the "Spit" and the name of the Hotel. Even the GPS doesn't show it. I think this is the Alaskan version of the Redneck Riviera (Panama City Florida). The Fishermen are King here too...Sockey, Trouts, Lingcod, Rainbows and more. And the boats are funny looking-do you think they say that when they visit Florida? O
ur room has a trundle bed and a pull down twin (as in attached to the wall over the chest of burgundy drawers).Keith and I tossed a coin on who got what. While our room looks liike a throw back to the 70's it ain't cheap. Making it all the more "charming" right? I guess if you divide it by 5 guys then the price fits the decor. We are talking pink "levelor" blinds. They do have a spa and I made an appointment for a facial. Having had some some freaky experiences facialing around the globe I now ask the particulars..."I need a deep cleansing. Do you do this? We are talking villa
ge dirt and mud caked on the kisser". The young man says "I am sure you will be happy with your treatment". I reply "honey, I'm never happy with anything. Same question." Oh Oh, I'll have to make a few calls and I'll get back to you. Let's set up the appointment for 9:30 bla bla". So I jump in the shower, then the car and buzz across town... 1/2 way there I give the guy a call back just to confirm. "oh oh. Let me have the facialist call you....she's not quite here yet". And she would be where? "Home". Home? "Oh oh Mrs. Collins why don't you come in and have a cup of tea with me and she will be here in a jiffy". Jiffy? That would be a big Oh No. Have her call me, I'll go get the car washed, I am starting to leave messages on the hood the dirt's so thick.... Ring Ring. "Hi this is Jennifer. How are you? Where are you from? How can we help you? etc etc." Cut to the chase Jen, I need a deep clean. How do you do it? I don't want a bunch of oil rubbed on my face and call it a facial. "Um, Um, well we rub oil on your face because we are not aestheticians". YOUR'E NOT WHAT?! What in the heck are you???? "Well I work part time at the Moose Tooth Bar". And you want to charge me $135 for a 40 min oil make my face worse facial? GAABYE.So not to waste the time behind the wheel (Buba won't let me drive much) I said let's get this car clean. So I found the car wash. No easy task mind you . Kept looking for 20 Brazilian (or Alaska's equivalent) guys with rags and matching t shirts speaking a language I don't understand. Nope. But I did find a sign that said Car Wash. So I drove into this garage that had a hose type contraption on the wall. I waited and waited for the guy to come out to wash the car. Finally, some guy that was in the car behind me came up to the window and said "hey lady when are you going to wash the car?". Hello Mr. Alaska, I am waiting for the car wash guy." Then he shared (I guess that really doesn't describe his manner) and said something to the effect "well maybe that's the way they do it in Florida, in Alaska we wash our own cars!". So I calmly looked at him and said "I knew that" and Bocahontas drove off.
SALTY DAWG SAL
OONThis has got to be the manliest state. Making Australian, Irish and Texas men look like wussies. The Salty is Buba's new hang out. The bumper stickers are stellar Alaskan style "Your Kid May Be An Honor Student But You're Still An Idiot", "GUT Fish?", "Fillet and Release" and on and on. Course the breaking news was Sarah resigning...as if my day wasn't trying enough with the non-facial
and car wash that never was. You can imagine the crowd at the Salty Dawg..."good for her, I would quit a long time ago, tell them to go pound sand and then it got even more colorful from there. These Alaskan's are a feisty bunch. I think the bumper sticker sums it up "Think. They haven't taken that right away. Yet."FAS
On the flip side I also learned about Fetal Alcohol Syndrome up here. I assure you it's rampant and ugly. This disease is caused due to drinking during pregnancy. There is a an organization NOFAS (National Organization on Fetal Alcohol Syndrome) started in 1990 committed to prevention, advocacy and support. http://www.nofas.org/ The primary group with this problem is American Indians and Alaska Natives. The number of births with this diagnosis is higher than autism, downs syndrome, cerebral palsy, cystic fibrosis and spinal bifida COMBINED! The deal is this is a PREVENTABLE disease. The average cost to treat this over the life time of the child is $1.4 mill-I personally think this is underestimated. This of course all relates back to the significant alcohol problem in many villages/reservations. Certainly a GODLESS life doesn't help lick the problem....AA's success is very much based on a "higher power" concept. From some of the research it would seem this "alter ego" of a higher power would be a fit with the Native Alaskans (seeing that the former Chief Model was their guider (alter ego) in many ways). Why doesn't AA work in these villages? The cost is monumental, not only to the individual but to their family and tribe. Illness, other related diseases, accidents and SUICIDE are some to name a few.
To sum it up, how can a beer for one guy be ok and a beer for another is not? Go figure.